Thursday, November 11, 2010

Following the Yellow Brick Road

Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high,
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue,
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true.

Someday I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far
Behind me.
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly.
Birds fly over the rainbow.
Why then, oh why can't I?

If happy little bluebirds fly
Beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can't I?

“Over the Rainbow” from The Wizard of Oz

I don’t know why, but for some reason God speaks to me in themes. Maybe it’s because that’s what I need to listen or just the best way to explain things to me in terms that I understand. Maybe I just have a soft spot for analogies (which I so totally do). Irregardless, I keep noticing a trend of things like that happening. A thought will start by me or someone else and just take on a life of its own. From there it will be revisited through various friends (discussions), tv, music, church, and any other place that I draw information from.

A couple days ago I wrote about feeling like I am on a path and feel like I took a pit stop for a rest and just never got back up. Since then (well before then as I think back), all I keep hearing and getting is this reoccurring theme of being on a journey, a path, and writing my own story. I keep being consciously reminded that I am supposed to be writing MY story, not duplicating other’s stories. I have to admit that’s a hard thing for me to accept. I look at the road others live on and I want that. I also have to admit that living a life trying to duplicate the circumstances of others is a lot of the reason I am in the place I am in (going through the tough broken time that I am). It’s embarrassing to admit, but I am guilty of believing that because others that I respect and try to live life like get to live out a certain story that God has planned the same for me. Sadly (but in reality thankfully) God has written a different path for me. Apparently one very different from what I wanted and expected. My story isn’t like anyone else’s. It’s taking me this long to realize, my story (like everyone’s even though I don’t see it) was uniquely written for me. For some reason, this valley is an important part of taking me to the next part of it.

It’s gonna take a strange path here (haha “path”) so stay with me (well I think I’m funny, haha). I thought this was kinda cool…

My sister for some reason got this idea that (I guess because I kept mentioning a path) that my life right now is a lot like The Wizard of Oz. This is funny because that is one of my favorite movies ever (and it used to scare the crap out of me when I was a kid-a little foreshadowing perhaps? Haha). She said, “You need to stay on the yellow brick road.” You keep wanting to get off, but you need to keep going (from here on out I am paraphrasing what she brought up and then where my overactive imagination took it).

I have hit the poppy seed field and if I don’t get up and fight against the sleep I will just lay down and never continue. The poppy seeds in my life are the fear of my unknown future, the fear that comes with giving up control. It represents complacency in my walk with Christ because growing is harder than turning back and giving up. Some days it just seems easier/better to just going back to existing rather than learning to live. It’s also trusting that the path before me is strong (and right) and the city (one of the many Emerald destinations God takes us on His path) truly exists (that there is more than this hopeless place I feel I am currently in). 

As I struggle to get up and continue on along the path, I also must fear the flying monkeys that threaten to snatch me off the path altogether. I think those monkeys represent the temptation to just stray from this life, from this plan and just be like everyone else. I mean, as long as we have accepted Christ what difference does it make if there is no growth from here? It would be easy to take care of myself only. And I’m not even talking about making bad choices or outwardly hurting others, I’m just talking about living life concentrating on anyone and anything before God. I have a lot of good people in my life, people I care about and who genuinely care about me. But I so often feel alone on this path I am talking. As good the intentions are of most of those friends, we are spiritually and emotionally in very different places. It’s often very hard to look at the intense feelings I have and not let myself feel ashamed of them. I want to stop and admit that is SERIOUSLY wrong of me, but in honesty it is how I feel (and I’m sure others can agree they do sometimes too). But, as my wise mother reminded me yesterday, God isn’t calling me to be accountable for everyone else’s growth (which I often let myself believe I am). He is holding me accountable for my own. I don’t have to continue to grow, I could just hang back here with everyone else (who hopefully will continue to grow at their own pace), but that is not who God created me to be. That’s not my path.

The enemy, much like the wicked witch, uses these weaknesses in me (and these are two of the things that have a tendency to inhibit my growth) to slow me down and knock me off the path. My fears are magnified, doubt is placed, loneliness becomes my guide. I start to see the point of this life (and goal) as being happiness and comfort, both of which God says are fleeting and temporary. It’s hard to feel truth’s light when you are hiding in the shadows. God is calling me to a life of more than just settling for easy and being mediocre. He wants me to go the spiritual distance.

I see how each of the character’s plights compare to human nature in general. We are all looking for wisdom (brains), heart (emotional fulfillment), courage (the noooiiivvvee…I couldn’t resist), and a home (our place and identity, who we are in Christ…although most of us never stop to try to figure it out). God created us with these needs to seek Him to fulfill them. I was trying to figure Toto out, I guess he’s those loyal friends who God  blesses us with on this path, the ones that help save us from the poppy seeds and flying monkeys, the ones that stand beside us reminding us this is a pit stop, not our destination.

I literally could probably come up with a dozen other metaphors for life and God from the film, but this is probably a good place to stop. But I do like a good tie in quote or set of lyrics and “Over the Rainbow” fit in perfectly. Our destination is a place where there will be no troubles, where things are made right. But until then, it’s important to keep following the yellow brick road.              

No comments:

Post a Comment