Monday, September 20, 2010

Lead from what we Learn

(Sunday's post)


I look around and see my wonderful life
Almost perfect from the outside
In picture frames, I see my beautiful wife
Always smiling, but on the inside, oh, I can hear her saying

Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can’t
Don’t leave me hungry for love, chasing dreams
But what about us
Show me you’re willing to fight
That I’m still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone

I see their faces, look in their innocent eyes
They’re just children from the outside
I’m working hard, I tell myself, “They’ll be fine; they’re independent”
But on the inside, oh, I can hear them saying …

Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can’t
Don’t leave me hungry for love, chasing dreams
But what about us
Show me you’re willing to fight
That I’m still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone

So Father, give me the strength to be everything I’m called to be
Oh, Father, show me the way to lead them
Won’t You lead me?

To lead them with strong hands
To stand up when they can’t
Don’t want to leave them hungry for love
Chasing things that I could give up
I’ll show them I’m willing to fight
And give them the best of my life
So we can call this a home
Lead me, ‘cause I can’t do this alone
Father, lead me, ‘cause I can’t do this alone

-“Lead Me” by Sanctus Real

“Our lead singer Matt wrote the basics of this song in response to the convicting words of his wife, Sarah, as she called him to the task of being a better spiritual leader for their family. With prayer and repentance, he listened. Matt wrote this song out of a fresh revelation that it requires a daily habit of seeking God in order to understand and live out this ebb and flow of leading with humility and being led in obedience." (Sanctus Real).

God calls members of a marriage and parents to be leaders of their families. But what about those of us who have not yet made it to that journey of our lives? Are we still called to lead those in our lives, where we are? God undoubtedly encouraged that when He created us all to be different and to have a need for community. However, I believe there are multiple ways to lead and some are more effective tools for growth than others.

Being part of a supporters group for a major league sport is incredibly fun. The group dynamic consists of a board of directors, a group of leaders if you will, and then members. The members depend on the leaders to keep everyone on track (singing, momentum, money, dealing with security & league, etc). As with anything, there are multiple types of leaders. However, there are two types I can most easily identify: Those that take the reins (command order) and those who lead by example (sing the loudest, give the most effort). Where both are necessary at times, one is definitely more effective to give momentum and create unity among this group of different people who come together for a common goal. (This was not meant to be offensive to anyone or to be used to call anyone out about anything- just in discussing group dynamics, I thought this was a good example of types of leadership-it is in no way my intention to offend anyone).

I have a leader’s personality. I can’t help it, that’s just the way I think. I am the first born in a family of strong personalities. I have always been a sort of a leader among my friends. I am one of the leaders of my small group. I often lead the plans when we go on trips. I tend to take the reins when making decisions. Again, it’s just the way I think. I tend to take command and demand a following. I don’t mean to do this to take away from anyone, but I do see how often that’s what inadvertently happens.

Talking with two of my family members on the way home from our trip, we started discussing leadership roles of couples, families, and men/women in general. Being an incurably single female with a strong personality, I am extremely aware of my need to control and be in the lead of things and how hard it is going to be for me to learn to compromise that in my future relationship. How hard it is to compromise it within my current friendships. I need to learn to move from that commanding role of leadership to the type where I lead by example (and also learn to be led).

When challenging a group spiritually, the commanding type leadership is useless. You can’t force a change upon people. The only thing you can do is lead by example. Start to live the life and walk the path you are asking them to embrace. Just ask the song above mentions, this kind of leadership is impossible if not fueled by a pursuit of Christ in your life. We can’t do it alone, it’s not within our capability. Christ has called all believers to be leaders, not by mouth but by our actions.  

I have been thinking about leadership a lot lately. God created us all differently, to lead in areas where others can’t and/or to help them master the areas they are meant to learn to lead. Sometimes leading is understanding other’s need to lead and taking a step back because that is what is best. It’s also realizing you need to be led as much as you need to lead. Take time and look at what kind of leader you are (because we all are, even if we don’t realize it). Are you leading by example?

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